I Wish You All the Best

I Wish You All The Best, directed by a trans person, has received good reviews. A Bronx connection: she went to Fordham University. This is her directorial debut. She was an actor in 13 Reasons Why, another case where I only read the book. 

I noticed Cole Sprouse had a supporting role as the protagonist's brother-in-law. I remember him as Ben, the son of Ross and Carol (a lesbian), on Friends. Now, he is in his 30s. Time flies. 

“Non-binary” is an umbrella term that includes those whose identity falls outside of or between male and female identities; as a person who can experience both male and female, at different times, or someone who does not experience or want to have a gender identity at all.

The film concerns another Ben, who is kicked out after they come out as nonbinary to their parents. They moved in with their sister, who had left the family years earlier. Ben has a path of self-discovery, including a cute romance. The book is overall well-written. 

Lena Dunham has a role in the film as an understanding art teacher. The character is Asian-American in the book. The film also, for some reason, also has the sister having a newborn. I don't see a Muslim nonbinary character listed, who plays an important role in the book as Ben's mentor.

Mild spoilers. In the book, things overall work out well for Ben. Their sister provides a safe haven. She and her husband have the resources to help them. It's convenient, for instance, that the brother-in-law is a teacher and helps Ben transfer to a new school. 

They and their parents do not reconcile. They overall do not come out well at all, hints of backward religious beliefs. The mother comes off better. She feels sorry about the pain she is causing her children. But, ultimately, she is loyal to the father. 

(I began using male pronouns for Ben when writing this piece. Even the hosts of Gay USA sometimes trip up with using preferred pronouns. It can be tricky.)

The book shows the value of therapy, the usage of anti-anxiety medication, and dealing with social anxiety. It also shows the essential nature of finding good support. Ben finds a support network that they did not have before, including in school. 

Before, they didn't hang out with people. Finding someone who here helped Ben find two more close friends was oh so important. This is a general principle and not limited to people on the LGBTQ+ spectrum. 

Attacking trans people is deemed acceptable by many governments, up to and including the Trump Administration. Transphobia is both understandable (as far as bigotry can be) and ridiculous.

Transphobia arises from different things. The Trump Administration being so anti-trans might confuse someone. It seems logical (if wrong) for them to target Democrats in illegitimate ways or monetize the government or demand utter loyalty to Dear Leader.  

Why the anti-trans stuff? It does have a right-wing religious angle. It is fitting that the Religion Clause Blog often has news on trans-related lawsuits. Sex and gender flexibility clash with right-wing religious beliefs. Not "Christian" beliefs. To be clear. 

Such beliefs do not only have a religious angle. People can be religious and support nonbinary and trans people. Religious positions often have more to them.

Gender fluidity endangers traditional masculine-dominant beliefs and practices. Fascism and authoritarian governments regularly promote such beliefs. It is fitting that one book about them is entitled Strongmen. Anti-trans policies fit in here.

A book (written by a non-binary person) and a film (directed by a trans person) respecting the self-actualization of a binary person are quite important. We need to be good people and provide support for those in need. We need to not focus on false issues.

A final word about young adult non-fiction. It is often not only for young adults. After all, people enjoy television shows and films about teenagers without being teenagers themselves. YA fiction can be similar.