He uses a pseudonym, though early on noted she originally chose "Marina" as a feminine name. It's unclear if that means they did not use that name.
Sim Butler discusses raising a trans child, including general information (about sports, health issues, and so on) and personal narrative. His state's passage of anti-trans legislation, including making him a felon if he provided health care to his child, led the family to leave the state.
(The state government's current mentality is suggested by this review of the book, which appears to be written by a conservative-leaning website that focuses on state news. The discussion keeps on, for instance, talking about "his son.")
There is a depressing quality to that which is familiar. Becoming Nicole was written ten years ago. (The subject wrote her own book recently. She is now in her 20s.) To be able to provide the best care for their daughter, the parents basically lived apart, so she could go to a supportive school.
Kate and her family received support from family, friends, and their liberal minded church when she first came out. Things went less well in first grade, though the school assured them things would go okay.
A new teacher led things to go sideways. They went to another school, which required the author to get another job to afford to pay for it. What about people without similar resources? I ask rhetorically.
The author loves his home state, but is a tad bit naive, though he grants he is protected as a white, economically privileged individual. Alabama, in recent years, has had other conservative complications. The book, for instance, doesn't talk about reproductive rights. The author is liberal.
Butler references his grandfather, who was a sheriff for decades, ending around 1990. He vaguely references that, at first, a quick search suggested that the grandfather was not a "heavy" as compared to other officials during the Civil Rights Era.
He then suggests maybe he was being a bit naive without going further. Yes, that seems to be true. Butler doesn't press the point, but perhaps figured he had to talk about his grandfather since he was a public figure. A jail was named after him, after all.
The parents' fighting the dragons helped Kate have a safe space to develop. Her gender dysphoria, before having a chance to live her life in a way matching the gender she knew in her mind, led to various negative consequences.
She was much happier when she was able to be her true self, including in a safe and supportive school environment. Which, perhaps a bit amazingly, did exist in Alabama in her early years.
(Conservative politics in the state eventually targeted her supportive middle school.)
She still worried about publicly being a girl (it led her to dislike organized sports) in such contexts. She worried about how others might see her. Non-trans boys and girls also sometimes have comparable gender issues. What is a "normal" gender identity?
The book ends with the story incomplete. We live in anti-trans times. There is a reference to anti-trans legislation being proposed in their new, more purple-leaning (unnamed) Southern state. Kentucky? Georgia? Kate, however, seems to be doing well.
The epilogue references Martin Niemoller and his famous "First they came for" quote. A useful comment, especially given all the targets these days.
Trans people are a leading target these days. A majority of states have anti-trans legislation.
The Supreme Court upheld anti-trans legislation, refusing to even acknowledge it as anti-trans. Shades of Plessy v. Ferguson, saying any feelings of discrimination are only "in their head"?
Nonetheless, trans people continue to exist, and they and their families and communities keep on insisting they should be and can be happy, have support, and be treated as individuals. Parents play a leading role.
I am somewhat amazed at how parents do it. Me and my siblings surely were no prizes. Oh well.
Check out the book. Recommended.
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Thanks for your .02!